Anticipation in overdrive
Anticipation is a powerful and deeply human emotion. It’s the feeling that arises when we look ahead, sometimes with hope, sometimes with foreboding. But it is based on our thoughts toward something that hasn’t yet happened. It's a feeling that should usually be fleeting, just popping into your mind about an upcoming event for example. But for those living with a long-term health condition anticipation becomes a constant companion. It can surface before medical appointments, test results, treatment changes, or even daily tasks that might be affected by fluctuating symptoms.
While for a lot of people, anticipation can bring moments of joy, like the hope of a good day or the possibility of progress, it can also be a significant source of anxiety for anyone susceptible to emotional distress. When the future feels uncertain or potentially negative, the mind may spiral, imagining worst-case scenarios or fearing setbacks. This emotional tension, which according to the experts is known as anticipatory anxiety, can be especially intense for those managing a persistent health condition, where unpredictability is part of their landscape. Anticipation, even in its quietest form, can feel overwhelming because it is tethered tightly to our own uncertainty and vulnerability. The cycle can include physical symptoms like restlessness, fatigue, or difficulty sleeping, and beneath it all, a quiet emotional ache. Have you felt this too?
Because living with a long-term health condition means navigating a future that’s often uncertain, how can we learn to manage the emotional weight of anticipation, build resilience, reduce anxiety, and if we are lucky, create a space for hope, even in the midst of some significant challenges.
There are lots of practical strategies that can help. As always I will leave these to the experts. In my blog I simply want to let you know what works for me. It doesn't mean they are right for you, they are simply my thoughts and experiences that are slowly helping me. Journaling can help process fears and clarify thoughts. I find this one to be very powerful and I do practice this everyday. Some even make it into my blog ☺️. Connecting with others is another biggie for me, whether this is through online support groups and communities or with family and trusted friends. It can help remind you that you’re not alone in this experience. There are some brilliant sites like Healthunlocked, Anxiety UK and support groups on Facebook. These are just a few and am sure there are lots of others out there.
The aim is to try to build your resilience in the midst of upcoming challenges, be these appointments, therapies or even procedures. To cultivate the emotional strength to deal with these situations we need to try and develop the ability to sit with that tension, rather than be overwhelmed by it. Managing anticipation isn’t about suppressing the emotion, it’s about trying to learn how to hold it gently and understand its underlying roots. and to respond with intention rather than reaction.
The next part is easier said than done. But even a small shift here can be incredibly powerful. It’s about accepting that the outcome will be what it will be. We can’t control it. But we can take away its power by reframing the narrative. Instead of asking, “What if...?”, we can try: “What can I take away from this, no matter how it turns out?”
I know this isn’t something that I can change overnight, but I am going to stay committed to the process. Some days these techniques feel more effective than others, and that’s okay. I’m learning to set the pace, and take it one step at a time.
This brings to mind a story from many years ago that includes one of our very mischievous cats we had at that time.
Because we had a busy Christmas coming up my hubby and I decided to throw a bit of a pre-christmas party where we could get together with some of our friends as we wouldn't get to see them over the holiday season. As I have mentioned before my love of all things Christmas was no secret so my anticipation for the party was palpable.
I put together a lovely little but simple buffet of finger sandwiches, sausage rolls, etc and even a couple of black forest gateaux’s (believe me they were all the rage at the time). I was just laying it all out on the table when our guests started to arrive and I got somewhat distracted by this. I had every intention of going back to cover the food to keep it fresh but somehow a good half hour had passed before I remembered this. So imagine my horror when I walked back into the kitchen to find one of our cats sitting in the middle of the dining table with a very smug look on his face, (believe me he knew this was a big no no!)
He had only managed to snag and eat all of the meat out of the sandwiches and innards of the sausage rolls. The best laugh was that he had done this without touching the salad in the sandwiches and the sausage rolls, albeit a bit disarrayed, were still on the plates; they just had holes where the sausagemeat once was! Luckily the cakes were still sitting on the kitchen worktop in their boxes so they were untouched. But as it would have been a very strange buffet of just crisps and gateaux so we had to think fast. I bet you can say you have never been to a buffet that served cheese on toast soldiers and sliced boiled eggs. We even managed to find some more salad in the fridge so we were at least able to garnish the plates. Luckily we also had a plentiful supply of crisps in the pantry so we could replace the original bowls, though there was quite an eclectic mixture of flavours in the bowls as we had to use the variety packs we had in to bulk out the buffet.
What I anticipated as a traditional buffet was a feast of a different kind. But do you know what, I realised that the food was just a detail, the main joy was being surrounded by some of our closest friends.
Come and join me on the walk through that place of anxious anticipation towards a place of calm reflection.
Virtual hugs to you all. Take care
